Adam

I have a new housemate, his name is Adam and he lives above me. He sings very loud in the morning and when he needs to go to the toilet he does a poo on the floor outside the front door of the house. Adam is a sparrow and lives in the guttering above my bedroom window. At the weekend I am planning on hanging out of my window with a coat hanger and will attempt to remove the nest. However I have two concerns:

1. If Adam has baby chicks in there and I disturb the nest leading to their deaths I will feel very guilty and slightly concerned that I could possibly be arrested by the RSPCA

2. I like Adam

For some reason I have taken quite a shine to Adam he looks like a bit of a laugh and I love how cheeky he is to break my guttering, wake me up at 6am and then shit all over the floor whilst not even contributing to the rent or buying his share of Robinsons no added sugar orange squash. The problem is that I have given him a name and built up a little bit of an emotional attachment.

I think I am going to try and tame him and keep him in my pocket like Florence Nightingale did with her owl and Brooks did with his pet bird in Shawshank Redemption.

I will let you know how I get on.

In other news I found out that I have got through to the semi final of the Amused Laugh Off 2010 which is very exciting. Its in Soho on Saturday 26th June if you wanna come and watch.